How to Handle a Colleague Hitting On You

Have you ever been in a situation at work where a coworker has blatantly hit on you? Yea, me either, but let’s just pretend it happened. You are sitting at your desk and one of your colleagues approaches and begins to openly flirt with you. What do you do next? Do you hit them back with some smooth talking or act awkward and shy away from the conversation? Whichever path you choose you need think quickly on how you will react. Let’s lay out two scenarios and proper ways to handle each scenario to ensure you get the outcome you were hoping for.

Scenario 1

In scenario 1, a colleague approaches your desk and begins to flirt with you. For whatever reason you are not interested in any sort of relationship beyond a working one with this individual. How do you handle the situation? You want to be careful with how you proceed with the conversation. If you are too abrupt and let them know you are not interested, you could come off as pompous and presumptuous. Engage in the conversation and give surface level answers. Try to avoid making continuous eye contact. If you lock eyes the entire conversation this can give off the opposite vibe you want, try to break eye contact by looking at your computer or your cell phone. This will let them know you aren’t fully engaged in the conversation, thus you probably aren’t interested in their advances. Also, if you keep your conversation surface level and generic, you are indirectly letting them know you aren’t interested in providing intimate details about yourself, thus you may not be that into them.

Scenario 2

In scenario 2, a colleague approaches your desk and begins to flirt with you, except this time you like them too. How do you handle this situation? Essentially you do the opposite of scenario 1. Engage in eye contact the entire conversation and smile often. Ask them about things outside of work in an attempt to know their life outside of the cubicle walls. Stop by their desk randomly to say hi. Office flirting isn’t always a bad thing, but it must be done in moderation to avoid office rumors. Lord knows there is always the cubicle gossip king or queen ready to spread the word of a blooming office romance.